Artistic blur

9:12 AM

I'm and I've been slightly near sighted for years and until recently I barely noticed it, wearing my glasses only to watch a movie or read for long hours. The last time I bought glasses was in 2001 and then my sight was still at -0.5 or something, so really not much to worry about, road signs were then slightly blurry from a distance but I still drove without wearing my glasses and had no issues.
Things seemed to have suddenly changed about a year and a half ago though, as I started noticing that forgetting to take my specs to the cinema was stupid and made for a slightly less painful watch with me squinting my eyes more. DH has been nagging me for ages about me wearing my glasses all the time too, but I hate them.

I hate how I look with glasses, even though it's a light classic frame, it makes me look like the type of head librarian that would shout "Silence please" every now and then. Then on the rare occasions I tried wearing them to walk around I felt AWFUL, things were suddenly sharper, I felt trapped into an aquarium of some kind and it made me even more dizzy than walking around without, plus I hate feeling that "weight" as light and insignificant as it is with titanium frames, it was there, it was an added appendix to my body I really didn't need. DH who is a glasses wearer think it's silly.

But now I'm seriously considering going for an eye check (ok been doing so for a year!) because my good old glasses do not seem comfy enough to watch TV anymore as I find myself squinting to see the screen even with them on. And for the past few weeks I realised that once you put me in an "unfamiliar" territory such as a busy shopping mall, or an hypermarket I see a lot of blur and strain my eyes to make up the sharp features of people around me, not to mention that since it's too much "exercise" to do so, I tend to tune out and not really pay attention to the sights around me anymore. Worse I can't even seem to read some billboards and huge signs without frowning. I think I start to actually feel a bit "disabled" outside the house, I stress on the "outside" because inside the house things are fine, though yesterday I forced myself to pay attention, and yup indeed I make up less details even in my own surrounding, but it seem to matter less because I know them well, well enough to not switch on the lights in the middle of the night to navigate from the bedroom to the bathroom and find a water bottle in our really dark kitchen, that too without hurting myself by bumping into stuff, funny considering I do run into doors in the morning when still sleepy.

Since I'm still writing this blog without wearing my glasses (please don't beat me here), and I still read books forgetting to wear them half of the time, I think it's not that bad, which is maybe why I do not see the urgency of seeing an eye doctor. I think my sight might have gone to -1 or -1.5, and I know that the day I decide to go for an eye exam I will have to change my lenses, but that unfortunately won't make me want to wear glasses anymore, so I'm starting to wonder if contact lenses are available for such a "low" strength to begin with. People tell me it's not good to wear lenses in India because of the dust, but I'm more willing to actually bear with sunglasses than regular glasses.
And I guess that has to do with the fact that when things are blurry, I do not notice as well that people are staring at me, I feel a bit more "invisible" and blend in, simply because I don't stare back at things that I don't see too well in the first place. With sunglasses I have the convenience of watching without appearing to stare and somehow make me feel as anonymous as in my artistic blur if not more.

Anyway, I think I really should do something about my eyes now, and hopefully I will remember to dial the clinic and make an appointment and sort this out somehow.


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