Treat yourself like a VIP

12:21 PM

 


With yet another lockdown plaguing us over here in Mumbai I am doing everything I can to focus on myself and I dedicated April to the next level of self-care. 

I've been going on and on about self-care and how important it is in the past year or so, and fortunately, being stuck at home non stop is giving me the opportunity to focus on myself in ways I would have completely avoided pre-pandemic. The past 13 months have brought a lot of personal growth, probably a lot more than in the last 5 years or so. 

In March, I bought the book "Lucky Bitch" in kindle format (It's an Amazon affiliate link) because I love self-help books, and ones on the topic of The law of attraction will always have a special place in my world. I recommend this book to anyone who is looking to a more practical approach to the "LoA", it offers a lot of great advices as to giving ourselves some respect. 

I'm no stranger to the fundamentals of the Law of Attraction, I'm good at manifesting what I want in general, and I'm definitely all on board when it comes to self-care and self-love. I've been advocating these for years on the blog. 
I still got something out of that book, and realised I could do better. Let's be honest, we all can, and there is always scope for improvement, that's how we grow. 

At one point in the book, Denise Duffield-Thomas mentioned that it's not unless we start treating ourselves with the due respect we are owed that we will see changes in our lives. In short it means that unless you treat YOURSELF like a VIP, nobody will. 
Let's face it, we all downplay ourselves, and settle for average, it's even more prevalent among women who've been trained from early childhood to step out of the spotlight and play a supporting role. My recent laptop story speaks volume about that. 




This April, inspired by the book, I decided to give myself the challenge to do at least ONE thing a day that takes me to the next level of self-care. I made the commitment to myself to not only do one thing a day that makes me feel awesome but also log it in my bullet journal
As a ground rule, I decided to NOT use food as a way to treat myself, it's the easy way out, and let's face it, thanks to this crazy pandemic, we are probably all eating entirely too much and do it out of boredom. Apart from this, anything that is new, special, and isn't already part of my routine qualifies as a special VIP treatment thing. 

Believe it or not, it's not always as easy as you'd think, being stuck at home 24/7 I have to often think out of the box to find something I haven't done already and it's even more dicey now that we also got slapped with a e-commerce ban on non-essentials. 
Since I already had the habit of journalling, practicing gratitude daily, treating myself to several tea breaks a day, long naps, and meditation, I had to evaluate what the next level would be for me. 
Fortunately, my constant journalling and the work I have done on myself in the past year did put into light a fairly annoying habit I have : 

Settling down for less than I originally want


I always had the tendency to be frugal, to use things until they really couldn't be used and then replace them with something cheaper than what I really wanted because, when you grew up in the environment I did, letting your ego get in the way spelled "Selfish". 
It has some positive of course, we could all use a bit of a "Waste not want not", the problem is I had the tendency to push it a bit too far at time. Proof being in the state of my night wear drawer among other things.
I always have been a casual person, I don't really like clothes shopping to begin with, and there is nothing wrong with that. The problem, is that at the end of a long day, I usually take a shower, and then slip into what can only be described as rags. 
I got in to the habit of demoting daytime t-shirts to the night wardrobe and wear those until they would barely work as a floor duster...it's THAT bad. 

On one hand, I am casually awesome during the day, but when it comes to winding down in private, I throw on the ugliest, frumpiest one can think of, because apparently I'm too cheap to just slip into bed wearing comfy non-holey t-shirts and shorts. Hardly something that shouts "I respect myself". 
I also tend to just do the bare minimum when it comes to a beauty routine and have been known to learn to do without a good pedicure even though I enjoy them (but decided they are a luxury).

So, among the several things I did to treat myself as a VIP in those past few weeks, I first treated myself to a one of those "foot peeling mask", the type where you slip on plastic socks for 3 hours and then wait a few days to see all the dead skin peel away in a gross and satisfying way. 
I also indulged in a few post shower face massages and frequent foot soak using epsom salts, things I rarely do. 
Then one night last week, I decided I was D.O.N.E wearing crappy t-shirts to bed, and the last purchase I did before the non-essential e-commerce ban were a set of cotton tank tops and cotton shorts. We are likely to stay home a while longer, the summer heat is getting to me, and I am done settling for casual clothes that don't feel great.

Other things I did are not material, they are things like decluttering random rubbish I have no use for, or stepping into my power and price my services the right way without guilt. Then there are the days I really felt unproductive and stressed and didn't soldier through, acknowledging that the most sensible thing was going to just have a full lazy day. 
Yesterday my self-care, VIP activity was to stop cribbing about the mess in the bathroom and do something about it. I removed all the things that were stressing me out, re-arranged things, and turned it into a bathroom that would make me smile rather than cringe. I did it with what I had on hand, thanks to the stupidest version of the lockdown we had so far, but I did it non the less and now I have a better vision of what I want to do next in this room.

In the past 3 weeks, my motto became "If it makes me cringe it has to go", no justifying it or downplaying it anymore. I've started approaching a lot of things very differently through this mini-challenge I gave myself already. 

It's not about spending money, it's about stopping making excuses NOT to solve a problem. This constant practice through small changes directly at my personal level is really starting to compound already, and the very fact I decided to no longer accept "average" for myself is also pushing me to see how I can solve other problems that are external to me better. 

All in all, I urge you all to give yourself that tiny challenge and see where it takes you. 



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4 comments

  1. It's important that we value ourselves. Do something constructive everyday. Even I like self-help books, and like you rightly say there is always scope for improvement.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think most of the books I have on my "to read" list are self-help books at the moment. I'm in a constant learning mode, and I feel great figuring out something new or doing something constructive.

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  2. Anonymous12:44 PM

    This is so true and something that many of us overlook. I've been trying to make small steps with my own self care over the last couple of years too, still have a long way to go! Do share what you're doing with your bathroom if you can, am trying to redo my own bathroom too. Finding it quite a struggle, I live in a rented appartment and for some reason the bathroom attached to the master bathroom is super tiny. The kids bathroom and guest bathroom are much bigger. Also, been reading your blog for years now, it's one of my favourites :) but commenting for the first time!
    Manasi

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    Replies
    1. Thanks for commenting Manasi :-)

      I am in the same boat with the bathrooms : rental property, super tiny, and quite frankly very badly planned as layout is concerned.
      I just got out of a 3 month long ordeal with bathroom issues now and about to be plunged into a kitchen renovation soon (thank god I am just renting).

      The plan in my bathroom is to get some cabinets under the sink at one point, but it's not our immediate priority. We are lucky that a previous tenant installed a wall mounted cabinet in the master bathroom so it contains a lot of the clutter already. I also try to keep the basin counter relatively uncrowded and added a scented candle in there which I burn around bath time to add to the cosy ambience.

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